i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
