Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
