what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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