oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize