think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
