Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
