Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
