you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Randomize