How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
