You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
