He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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