worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
These tits shall not be calmed
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
