am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
