it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
