I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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