You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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