tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Can I color on your dick again?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
