i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
