Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
