She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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