I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
