the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
