Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize