she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
