Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i love accidental penises.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
