the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
