I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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