I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
