Say something about gay babies.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
