Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
