so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
