do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
