I cannot find my penis.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
