I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
