I faked an abortion last night.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
