The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
