her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
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