I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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