And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
