Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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