I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
