so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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