im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
