She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
