gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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