there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just gargled with NyQuil
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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