She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize