I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
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