True but thats because hes a fetus.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
