im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
