I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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